Top 10 Movie Crotch Shots
Why fight fair, when you can fight dirty? In this video, http://www.WatchMojo.com counts down our picks for the top 10 movie crotch shots. For this list, we've looked at the best low blows the movies can throw up. To be in contention, the blow has to actually be landed, and the use of guns is not permitted (sorry, Robocop!). Both movies that were originally shown theatrically as well as direct-to-DVD features are eligible for consideration.
Special thanks to our users JakeCrusher, JayemWTF, kenn1987, Daniel John, kopsman124 and BustaJ for submitting the idea on our Suggestions Page at WatchMojo.comsuggest
Script written by Sean Harris.
#10: Nearly Everyone
“Jackass” franchise (2002-)
Best Movie Crotch Shots!
Let’s face it; a countdown of crotch shots could never be complete without the cultural phenomenon that is “Jackass”! When Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera, Steve-O and company get together, the ‘no pain, no gain’ motto takes on a whole new meaning. Full frontal male nudity has never been this fierce! With so many to choose from, it’s hard to rank one low blow above the rest - but the basketball stunts in “3.5” do have a certain je ne sais quoi about them!
#9: James Bond
“Casino Royale” (2006)
Top 20 Greatest James Bond Moments of All Time
Quite often, a big screen blow to the balls can have us squirming with laughter... But our next clip just has us plain squirming! In “Casino Royale,” James Bond is back, he’s brooding, and here, he’s buck-naked. As aesthetically pleasing as a clothing-free Daniel Craig might be, however, there’s little to lust over in this scene! A guy with no pants, a chair with no seat, a villain with a length of rope - it’s like whack-a-mole, only a lot less fun!
#8: Begbie’s Bar Brawl Opponent
“Trainspotting” (1996)
If it makes for uncomfortable viewing, then “Trainspotting” probably has it covered... No surprises then that this movie includes an especially memorable assault on the man-parts! Begbie’s like a psychotic, Scottish version of the Incredible Hulk - you don’t want to make him angry, but it’s incredibly hard not to! There’s trouble brewing in this bar, and Begbie’s about to go off! The point-of-view shot leaves absolutely nothing in doubt - that has got to hurt!
#7: Everyone on ‘Ow My Balls!’
“Idiocracy” (2006)
Top 10 Movie CROTCH SHOTS
Next, the irony is all on us! “Idiocracy” tells the story of a futuristic society in which intelligence and logic have been replaced by simple things and simple minds. Where once TV was smart and informative, it’s now straight to the point - or straight to the privates! The show “Ow My Balls!” is like “Jackass” for beginners... A compilation format showcasing various situations in which a character is hit in the groin - it has to be a hit!
#6: Harry
“Harry and the Hendersons” (1987)
Top 10 Harry Potter Movie Mistakes Spotted By the Fans
Heightening the hilarity, and putting extra hair on it, this penile pummelling is about as primitive as they come! Harry is a ‘Bigfoot’, a ‘Wookie’, a ‘Yeti’... A whatever you want to call him! This scene leaves at least one thing certain, however. When it comes to being kneed in the manhood, no matter how massive or mythological you are, it hurts! Cross your eyes and count to ten, Sasquatch, because size really doesn’t matter right now!
#5: Kick Boxer Opponent
“Hot Shots! Part Deux” (1993)
Top 10 Old Dudes Who Will Kick Your Ass!
We can’t help but find this funny, but we could also throw up! When Charlie Sheen lands a low one, he really, really lands it! He sends his opponent on a sensory roller coaster, first softening him up with a tirade of tickling. The laughter is not long-lived however, as Sheen soon takes matters downstairs. One major anatomical adjustment later, and victory is his. If you’ve ever wondered about the appearance of an unsheathed testicle or two, then here they are, in all their gross-out glory!
#4: Harvey Logan
“Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” (1969)
The Harvey Weinstein Scandal! - The CineFiles Ep. 42
There’s always an element of surprise to a well-executed low blow, and Butch Cassidy brings that. The classic cowboy doesn’t just hit and run, though, he trash talks his way into the manoeuvre, and he plays it to perfection! It’s not that Logan ‘doesn’t know what hit him’, it’s that he understands all too clearly! The kick, the boot, the thud, the fall... It’s painful poetry in motion!
#3: Pumola
“Bloodsport” (1988)
“Bloodsport”‘s a pretty brutal movie at the best of times, but the following is its flinching, pinching pinnacle! Jean-Claude Van Damme has on his hands a hostile crowd and a pretty huge opponent. But every man has his weak spot, and by now we all know where that is! Kicks are being landed, punches are being thrown, but damage isn’t being done... Cue the splits in slow motion, and a rapid right hand. The poor guy’s down for the count, and probably infertile!
#2: Willie, Marcus & Thurman
“Bad Santa” (2003)
It might not be ‘classic Christmas’, but it is gonad-bashing gold! Thurman’s being bullied so, naturally, he finds himself in a boxing ring with Santa and his little helper... As you do. They’re calling for him to ‘get mad’, and the kid’s natural instincts take over... The result is a rally of first-class fisticuffs to the frontal regions - after which the entire holiday season is left howling in pain! From this point forth, the carols were sung in a slightly higher key!
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
- Francis
“Superbad” (2007)
- Angry Little Person
“Project X” (2012)
- Mutant
“X-Men: The Last Stand” (2006)
- John Bennett
“Ted” (2012)
#1: Restaurant Staff
“Dumb and Dumber” (1994)
In dream world, anything goes! Why would you simply punch a guy in the nuts, when you could do so much more?! That’s Lloyd Christmas’s thinking anyway... Jim Carrey gets a little carried away within his own subconscious in our winning clip, as he fights for his love’s approval. His victim’s subjected to a speedy, snappy service - just not of the type that you might expect in a restaurant!
Do you agree with our list? Which low blow did we overlook? For more painfully funny top 10s published daily, be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com.
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